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Healthy Versus Unhealthy Humor
Unhealthy humor or harmful humor picks on the others, as individuals or groups. Harmful humor causes pain and creates distance between people. We all know someone who is always trying to get a laugh. The sad part of that is they want to get the laugh at someone else's expense. They do not stop to think about the effect it will have on the other person. The person using the harmful humor should be told what it is doing to their friends. Most of the times if they were told they would just say that they did not mean anything by their remarks. They were just trying to be funny. Too, most of us do not feel comfortable reprimanding someone for doing something wrong.
Tact should be used when asking or reminding someone about their hurtful remarks. Generally the individual making the funny remarks thinks that because they got a laugh, the behavior was ok. Harmful humor affects different people in different ways. Some people are made angry when they are put on the receiving end of a joke. They may respond by making harsh remarks to that person. They may just refuse to talk to the person or even continue to be friends. Some ...
... people may take it so serious as to let it affect their ego. It is hard for some not to feel they are not as pretty, as smart, or possibly even dressed as nice as others. It takes an uncaring person to consistently make hurtful remarks.
Harmful remarks that were not meant to hurt can be apologized for, but the damage has been done. Once a bad remark directed at an individual has been made, it cannot be taken back. Even though a person can say "that's okay" it does not take away the inside hurt. A good way to avoid ever hurting someone else is to always direct the humor toward themselves. Most of the time healthful humor pokes fun at oneself and situations.
Healthful humor creates closeness between people. Good humor is a thoughtful person using themselves or their situation as the laughter part. When life knocks them down, they pull themselves up, and then focus on the absurd parts of their experience. Humor can help us cope with the most unpleasant and painful experiences. It can be a buffer for pain and help us to stay focused at the most difficult of times. Humor can be used to poke fun at a situation. This is much better than aiming it at another person or group of persons. Humor is a good way to introduce oneself to others. This works especially well for a shy person. They can use humor as a connector expressing thoughts ideas and feelings they might otherwise keep to themselves. Humor is a good tool to use if it is used in the right way, the right time, and right place.
There is work involved in making sure you have good thoughts. It takes practice. Daily practice is a must. If you have a habit of hugging your kids and telling them you love them on a daily basis it didn't just happen. This is something you worked on and practiced. Oh, if all jobs or situations were this good. You are in charge of your own humor. You can choose to ignore or you can make sure it is included in your daily routine. Even a negative person needs to add a little humor sometimes. Who knows, they might loose some of the negative and become more positive. Ah, this might create a better world for all.
Healthy humor is when you can laugh at yourself and your situation. Humor changes our behavior and we find we are capable of talking more. Also we can get energy from humor, helping us to achieve where we might not otherwise. Good humor helps us to cope with distress. We cannot experience anger, guilt or be resentful and share humor at the same time. We have a choice to laugh or not to laugh. Having a sense of humor unites us with others especially when we can have a good laugh together. Humor helps keep things in perspective.
Author Mercy Emmanuel manages the Only Fools and Horses TV movies memorabilia website where you can get this classic TV comedy items at low prices. You will also enjoy great lovely Only Fools and Horses dvds comedy and other humour articles on this site.
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