Psychological Abuse In Relationships: Not Just A Woman Problem

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While the scars and bruises from physical trauma will fade with time, those from mental abuse and verbal abuse can last a lifetime. Treatment and recovery from mental abuse and verbal abuse are just as important for returning to good health as seeing a doctor for a gunshot wound. You would not ignore a deep cut to your person, and therefore, should give the same respect to your psyche. That being said, it is important to understand of what verbal abuse and mental abuse actually consists.

Psychological abuse in relationships is currently defined as a form of abuse that is characterized by one person subjecting another to behavior that is deemed to be psychologically harmful. Some examples given of mental abuse or verbal abuse include intentional humiliation and degradation of a woman by her spouse, threats made against the woman in the relationship and her children, and purposefully keeping her short on finances or isolating her from her friends or family. Having said that, it is important to remember that psychological abuse in relationships is not a female exclusive woe.

Statistically, ...
... the psychological abuse in relationships that men are subjected to is purely astonishing. This mental abuse and verbal abuse goes nearly completely unchecked and unresolved for a variety of reasons. First and foremost, men are far less likely to report any sort of mental or verbal abuse at the hands of their wife or girlfriend. Instead, they brush it off and accept it as a quirk of the gender. Add to that the fact that far more has been done to bring abuse against women to the forefront and prevent it than has been done for men and you can see why from a societal standpoint, everyone just assumes that women don’t do that sort of thing. This collective thought pattern, unfortunately, has led to a focus on only half of the problem of psychological abuse in relationships. A wide variety of independent studies have consistently demonstrated that men are responsible for a large part, but not ALL of reported abuse cases.

Put simply, men do not report psychological abuse in relationships. This does not mean it doesn’t happen, and it certainly does not mean there are no recovery options for them. There are many support groups, therapists, and even shelters that cater to victims of mental abuse and verbal abuse for ALL victims… of BOTH genders. Mental abuse and verbal abuse are a human issue, not just a women’s health issue, and psychological abuse in relationships from either gender to the other is as preventable as it is harmful and destructive. Though the dynamics of abuse toward women and abuse toward men are drastically different, the impact and results are the same, and so is the need to find a resolution… to heal.

Kris Leeds is a freelance writer for Carol Lambert, a licensed clinical social worker and psychotherapist with over 30 years of experience. Carol specializes in psychological abuse in relationships and treats women and men of all ages in two offices located in Concord and Belmont, Massachusetts. If you believe you are a victim of mental and verbal abuse, visit www.carol-lambert.com for guidance and more information.