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What Are The Benefits Arising From Divorce?
The effect of divorce is like an electric bolt running through you, you are numbed for the time being and the damage is realised only after some time. But nothing can be done while the current flows through you because you are under its power then. In one way, the same applies to divorce. You cannot really twist every which way and avoid all the pain at that time, but once it has blown over you, it is time to take stock again and heal yourself.
Finances
An average divorcee is usually in a financial mess after the divorce. There are truckloads of papers that may have to be discarded, redone, validated and created all over again. There are the complications of bank work, opening new accounts, closing the old ones, doing something about the mutual funds, investments, stocks, shares that you held jointly. You may have to make a new will. You will definitely have to evaluate your entire fixed and other assets, including a complete valuation of all property. But after it is all done, you will realise that managing finances singlehanded gives you greater control than ever before. Study the financial situation properly, ...
... take expert advice and start investing. Yes, money matters and there is no shame in being worried about it over and above matters of the heart. Remember that you have worked incredibly hard and given all those years of your life to make it here. You cannot afford to let it all go to waste now.
Career and Improvements
Many men and women are doing better than ever before only after they have divorced. ‘Many' is not just a light word here, because these examples are growing. While the net is full of stories of couples who have stuck together and benefited by it, there are also those who have their success stories starting only after they became single a second time in life. Not too surprisingly, this is true of all countries now. There were so many career moves you may have foregone because you were married at that time. Now is the chance to take it all up again, and channel your energy and even your anger into your work. So many home business and desktop millionaires began their story on the darkest day of their lives when their spouse left them struggling to make ends meet. These are everyday people who have risen very far out of courage and hard work, and are people worth emulating.
Rearing Children
Children are always affected adversely by divorce whether they show it or not. Whether you have won custody or visitation, the fact is that they are still your responsibility, now more than ever before. Many parents spoil their children after divorce by trying to pamper them in a bid to forget or escape their own feelings of guilt. This does not help. Nor does it help to ignore your children in a fit of selfish grief. The divorce gives you an opportunity to raise the children to be better individuals than yourself and to be stronger because of the experience they have had. They can be taught responsibility or escapism - the choice is yours.
Hobbies and Opportunities
Many men and women are often so deeply engrossed in their daily familial lives that they have no time for themselves. After the divorce, they go back to their old hobbies or take up new ones, and grab opportunities that they have been missing out on so far. Many artists and authors have evolved only after divorce. Many people have started up with things they are passionate about, developed a business line, and gone on to become really successful because they are now less hemmed in by circumstances. We are all born alike, and divorce does not mean that we can't be winners.
Health and Lifestyle
Health is an important issue that we often neglect or even abuse after divorce. That is definitely a bad idea. It is better to be a fitness freak than a couch potato eating piles of junk food and watching weepy videos at home to ruminate over the divorce. You will never get over that way. There are literally hundreds of men and women who have better lifestyles post divorce - and you could be one too.
James Walsh is a freelance writer and copy editor. If you would like more information on how to get a quickie Divorce see http://www.quickie-divorce.com
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