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Why People Don't Want To Get Married?
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We perhaps started living together bound by ties of kinship and friendship as soon as we started to walk upright. The institution of marriage invented by our ancestors is a wonderful manifestation of this need to form an enduring relationship with another individual of opposite sex.
Marriage caters to a primal human instinct. That is why it has not only survived but thrived for thousands of years and is found in every society and civilisation. True, marriage offers phenomenal benefits to the individual as well as the society, but it is also a fact of life that it has begun to lose its sheen in many Western countries.
Divorce rate has risen up manifold over the years. There has been a rise of individualism, backed by personal rights that are considered inviolable. Women have become liberated. They today have the same educational and job opportunities open to them as men.
All this has either helped increase the divorce rate or reduced the attractiveness of marriage. Today, many youngsters prefer to choose live-in relationships rather than tie themselves in a formal bond of marriage that has deep social and ...
... legal implications. There are many other reasons why some people do not want to marry.
Fear of Divorce
If everything goes well, marriage can be something blissful and very fulfilling. The partners support each other emotionally and financially and help in the spiritual growth of each other. They start a family by having children and bask in the glow of parenthood.
However, not all marriages are like that. Quite a few end in a painful divorce. This can occur due to many reasons, such as physical or emotional abuse, extra-marital affairs, lack of finances to maintain a decent lifestyle, desertion by a partner and so on.
When a divorce happens, it is a traumatic experience because of all the stress, anxiety and feelings of hurt one has to go through. Many divorced people shy away from remarrying, fearing another destroyed relationship and consequent emotional pain.
Careers-consciousness
The modern economy is based on professionalism and hard work where jobs and careers are taken very seriously. It is very important for a man to succeed professionally because one's financial success is tied to it. The more one rises in one's job, the more he or she gets access to money and prestige.
Time was when men were usually office-bound while women were home-bound. Not any more. Today, ambitious women take their careers as seriously and sincerely as men. Marriage for such people is an unnecessary distraction that would consume a lot of time with no professional returns. Many professionals delay their marriages into middle age or they do not marry at all, busy as they are with making money.
Commitment and Responsibility
Marriage is no casual relationship that is taken lightly. On the contrary, it is the most sacred and profound social institution created by man. It is a formal relationship that is approved by the society. It places certain obligations and responsibilities on both man and woman that are enforceable by law.
There is also a proper legal procedure for dissolving a marriage. One just cannot call it a day and walk away. This immense commitment and responsibility toward the spouse and children make many people shy away from getting married.
Loss of Personal Freedom
Before marriage, a person is like a free bird. There is no responsibility to anyone. You can while away your time any which way you want - party with friends, go travelling to exotic destinations, pursue your interests without disturbance, have as many girl friends or boy friends you want and indulge in free sex. After marriage, all this personal freedom vanishes in thin air and one has to hurry home straight from office and save money for a rainy day. Many people are unwilling to let go of their personal freedom and do not marry.
Financial Implications
Marriage has financial implications. You and your partner are supposed to pool your resources and income and buy family assets to improve your joint life-style and living standard. The partners frequently spend from each other's credit cards and bank balances. They take money from each other to buy things they want, such as cars, stereo, camera and so on.
A lot of money has to be spent on education and upbringing of children too. For many people, this kind of financial burden is unacceptable. They are unwilling to sacrifice their personal earnings on the altar of the family. They often prefer to remain unmarried.
James Walsh is a freelance writer and copy editor. If you would like more information on how to get a quickie Divorce see http://www.quickie-divorce.com
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