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10 Steps To Better Persuasion

10 STEPS TO BETTER PERSUASION
By Allen Parks, (c) 2007
1. Develop pacing naturally.
When you first learn how to pace, it can sound very stiff
and robotic. But pacing can become a very natural part of
you. Just feed them back their statement with a question. It
is important to remember not to paraphrase, but to use the
same words the person you are talking to is using. If they
say, "I went to such and such movie last weekend", you can
respond by asking, "Oh, you went to a movie last weekend?"
Covert hypnosis is about allowing all of these complex
methods to flow unconsciously. The more questions you ask
using their own language, the faster you will build rapport.
2. Keep your attention external.
You are trying to persuade another person which means you
want to observe their actions. That means you should pay no
attention to your own thoughts. Each time you go inside
yourself and ask yourself a question about the situation,
you are no longer watching them and you may miss what is
really going on. Simply watch ...
... their facial expressions, body
language, and listen to the types of words they use without
thinking about what technique you should be applying based
on their actions. Your response should be unconscious and
come about naturally. This is the secret of the real covert
hypnosis masters.
3. Write 100 examples of a new language pattern.
If you have to think about a language pattern in order to
use it, then its effectiveness has been severely diminished.
Language patterns should be expressed unconsciously and
naturally. This can be done by writing out 100 examples of a
newly learned language pattern. Then go out and slip into
every conversation as many times as you can. Do it so often
that you become bored with it. Then move onto learning a new
pattern. But remember covert hypnosis is not about learning
patterns. Without the right emotional state, body language,
tonality, and rapport you will most likely be perceived as a
strange talking weirdo!
4. Learn their yes and no positions.
Everyone has a direction the move towards when they say yes
and no. They will tend to nod in that direction, and they
may even turn their body slightly or even to a large degree
in that direction. Learn their yes and no positions and
gesture in those directions accordingly depending on your
objective. If you want them to perceive something in the
negative then anchor that thing in their "no" position. If
you want them to perceive something in the positive then
anchor that thing in their yes position. Good salespeople
use their hands often placing their product into their
client's "yes" space and their competition into their
client's "no" space.
5. Learn 3 minute stories.
Telling stories is one of the most powerful ways to persuade
someone. Our brains are wired for metaphor. We experience
reality through concepts and not directly. Learning to tell
short stories with a covert message in under three minutes
will increase your persuasions skills exponentially.
Practice a story many times in the mirror using different
tonality and body language. Express the emotion outwardly
that a words represents. Tell these stories to as many
friends and family members as possibly. Then begin telling
your stories to strangers.
6. Learn their representational systems.
People's representational systems are predominantly visual,
auditory, or kinesthetic (VAK). I can see the bright blue
ocean, I can hear the crashing of the waves, or I can feel
the warm sun on my skin and the sand beneath my toes. Some
so-called experts like to give percentages, but this is just
a model and every person is different. Speak to others from
their own unique perception of the world. What types of
sensory vocabulary do they respond more to? It is possible
for someone to have a predominant visual rep system, but
also respond favorably to sound words. Each person is
unique. Find out why!
7. Anchor yourself and others.
Many NLP practitioners learn to anchor the emotional states
of others, but never apply the same anchors to themselves.
By learning to anchor your own emotional states you will
have a better understanding of how those same triggers work
on others. Anchors can be anything. Traditional anchoring
involves a touch on the shoulder or hand, but actually we
can anchor facial gestures, a lean of the body, a certain
word. Use anything you want to. It's ok to be creative when
using these covert hypnosis techniques.
8. Feel that what you want others to feel.
After you learn to anchor your own emotional states you can
put yourself in the same state that you want to elicit in
another person. If your outcome is to make another person
feel good, but you do not feel good because you are stressed
out about other issues, you probably will not get very far.
A person's unconscious mind picks out every facial
expression, every minute detail of body language. Learn the
art of self-hypnosis. If you cannot get excited about the
product you are selling, how can you expect someone else to?
9. Practice tonality with yourself.
I have plenty of hypnosis CDs by other hypnotists. Some of
them are really wonderful, some of them need to thrown in
the trash. The deciding factor is 9 out of 10 times,
tonality. If you are being told to relax, but the pace of
speech is fast and jittery, and the voice is uneven and
high-pitched, you mostly like will become uneasy and
nervous. Learn to slow down and draw out your words. Drop
the pitch of your voice and learn how to turn tag questions
into commands.
10. Keep a journal.
Make sure you write an entry in a journal every day. Include
every thing you tried out during the course of the day.
Write down what did work and what did not work. After you
have written for a few months look for common themes your
unconscious mind may be communicating to you. When you feel
down because you are not sure if this covert hypnosis mumbo
jumbo is working or not, review your journal. You will be
surprised how far you have come along.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Allen Parks helps people to learn
techniques of meditation, conversational hypnosis,
persuasion and metaphor in order to increase the quality of
their lives. Read more about these topics at his website
http://www.covertmetaphor.com
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