Senior In Home Care

By Author: autor
Total Articles: 4328
Comment this article

When a family member tries to take care of a senior parent in his or her own home, often times the elder parent has some form of mental illness, compounding the difficulty of caregiving.

Setting limits with the people you love is a difficult but necessary part of life. Sometimes the parent with mental instability chooses to stop medical treatment, though that treatment might improve their symptoms dramatically. As a result of this choice, they still need to be taken care of and the burden is on the caregiver.

Often the excessive demands of one's parent, interferes with one's own family, and forces the caregiver to choose between their spouse and their children.

Many times the senior parent is behaving as though they are angry, and put their needs ahead of the caregivers without showing any appreciation, and thus causes many conflicts between parent and child (caregiver). If this is the way the parent has always been, then you will have to find a way to set clear limits with them and to assume no matter what you do, they will not believe you are doing enough. Under those circumstances, it is suggested you ...
... have a frank discussion with your family about what you are struggling with and let them help you set appropriate limits. If you haven't told them, it is important you tell them how much you love them and that you feel badly that you are not attending to their needs.

If your parent has always been as they are now, you probably have a reflexive way you deal with them, and your reflexes may not be helpful at this time. If your reflex is to do whatever they ask, you and your immediate family are going to pay a big price. It may be that your spouse and children can help you set limits that get your needs, their needs and at least many of your parent's needs met. While it is true, you will not meet all your parent's needs, remember that they are making the choice to stop getting treatment for their medical conditions, and you can't fix that.

If your parent's behavior is not typical, then there are other things to consider. Are they depressed? Is their medical condition or medications causing psychiatric symptoms? I would strongly encourage you or someone else you and your parent trust to have a discussion with them, and try to persuade them to get a careful medical evaluation that includes attention to those questions. It will be important for someone, perhaps you, to go with them to their appointment so the doctor understands how they've been doing and you get a clear understanding of what the doctor recommends. Once you have the information, I would suggest you bring your spouse and children up to date, and together you plan the next steps that best meet everyone's needs, including yours. It may help you, whether this behavior is typical of your parent or new, to work for a bit with a psychotherapist to help you make decisions that will be best in both the short and long term.

This is not an easy caregiving situation, as you're trying to provide the best home care for your senior parent in their home. Remember, No good deed goes unpunished and especially when you're dealing with someone with mental illness, no truer words were ever spoken.

Donation Pickup Services

There are many questions that arise when one is considering a donation pickup service - here are a few of the more common questions and answers.

1. IS MY DONATION TAX DEDUCTIBLE?

All donations are tax deductible at their present Fair Market value, which is the price a buyer would pay and a seller would accept.

2. WHY DOESN'T THE DRIVER WRITE AN AMOUNT ON MY RECEIPT?

The IRS places responsibility for the fair market value upon the donor. The driver does not see what items are donated in the bags or boxes and cannot make that determination.

3. HOW CAN I GET A RECEIPT FOR THE ITEMS I DONATED?

The driver of the company you're donating to usually leaves a receipt at or near the front door or garage door. The post office does not allow him to place it in the mailbox. If you do not receive a receipt or it is lost, please contact the donation pickup company.

4. WHAT HAPPENS TO MY DONATION AFTER YOU PICK IT IS PICKED UP?

They are resold and the proceeds from these sales help fund our programs.

5. DO I HAVE TO BE HOME FOR THE PICKUP?

Most often - No. Just leave your donation outside your front door or garage door by 8:30 AM marked with the name of the donation company doing the pickup.

6. WHY DO I HAVE TO MARK MY DONATION?

So the driver will be sure to take only the items you wish to donate.

7. WHERE SHOULD I PLACE DONATED ITEMS?

Please place your donation outside your front door or garage door. Sometimes other arrangements can be made, but you must set that up in advance by calling a representatives from the donation pickup service.

8. ARE THERE SPECIAL PICKUPS IF YOU LIVE IN AN APARTMENT OR CONDOMINIUM?

The donation pickup driver generally does not enter the building, so find out from your building manager or community representative about the rules for leaving donations out. Some towns and neighborhoods have strict rules about leaving donations outside.

9. WHY CAN'T THE DRIVER COME AT A SPECIFIC TIME?

Donation pickup companies often don't know where the driver will begin his route for the day. Weather and traffic conditions do play a factor in how quickly and safely a driver completes his scheduled stops for the day.

10. WHY CAN'T I TELL THE SERVICE WHAT DAY I WANT THEM TO COME?

There must be some kind of order and organization when scheduling pickups. Gasoline, insurance costs, driver salaries, and truck maintenance are considered when setting specific days for our trucks to be in certain areas.

11. WHY DOESN'T THE DONATIOIN PICKUP SERVICE ACCEPT BROKEN APPLIANCES OR FURNITURE IN DISREPAIR?

Because most times they do not have anyone to repair the item and they need to be in good condition to resell.

12. MY PICKUP WAS MISSED. WHAT SHOULD I DO?

Contact the donation pickup service as soon as possible to reschedule.