Secrets To Spectacular Online Relationship

By Author: Oksana Boichenko
Total Articles: 11
Comment this article

In reality, online relationships are not that different from regular relationships people share outside of virtual reality. So, what is the secret to transforming a relationship from ordinary to special, from burden to happiness? It is not nuclear science and things which will help you transform you relationship are very simple.
Understand your partner's needs
Being miles apart and not being able to actually participate in each other's lives physically is a major factor in creating an image of what your relationship is, and ignoring what it is not. Seeing only a small glimpse of your partner in emails or phone calls creates a set image in your head, which is often quite different from reality. This is especially evident in the beginning of your communication, when both partners are mystified and intrigued by each other. A few months down the road, when the excitement has died down a bit, reality slips into your communication and creates a gap between expectations and your partner's actions, which is a big source of disappointment. To minimize frustration, make sure that your conversations focus on ...
... different aspects of your relationship and that both of you voice your expectations. For example, your partner might be a very affectionate person, while you might express your emotions mildly. This can create imbalance, your partner might feel that something is wrong in the relationship, unless the two of you can freely ask questions and discuss your hopes. This will help both of you to have sound understanding of what you both want; it is also a good idea to discuss some important relationship issues again after some time, as people's wants/preferences tend to change over time.
10 minute rule
It seems after most couples get the basic idea of each other's life (job, living arrangements, etc.), their conversations deal only with practicalities: jobs, families, planning a meeting, etc. Routine is the worst thing for any relationship!! And while you might not be able to do something extraordinary living on different continents, a few minutes of deliberate getaway from routine can really do wonders. Take 10 minutes a day to share with your partner any information outside of routine tasks. This will help you know your partner intimately, which is the key to making an online relationship successful. Getting to know someone intimately does not mean you have to engage in heavy conversations, anything to help you learn something new about him/her will do: deciding which superpower you'd like to have, talking about your cat's conspiracy to take over the world, etc. It is such little things that will help you know each other from the inside and strengthen your bond.
Focus on the positive aspects
Most people think that the best way to improve a relationship is to fix things that are wrong. While you should, no doubt, strive for improvement, the best way to make your relationship more exciting is to focus on the positive aspects of it. Focus on the good makes us feel happy and motivates to move ahead. This does not mean you should not discuss negative things, but if you want happiness to prevail, bring more positive than negative in your relationship. The more you focus on joy and love, the more chances your relationship has to blossom, despite distance and any challenges.
Show your love
While it goes without saying that you two love each other, expressing your feelings and saying what you feel are important. It is not about doubting each other or your relationship; it is about letting your partner know you appreciate them. Sometimes hearing "I love you" is the best thing to cheer up your partner after a bad day, or a simple way to let him/her know you miss them, especially when you are far apart.
It is also curious that men, who hear positive affirmations from their partners, are more likely to say they are happy in relationships as opposed to men who do not get words and gestures of appreciation from their significant others. This is explained by the fact that Russian women get compliments from others - friends, colleagues, even strangers, but men do not get much of the same recognition (have you ever seen anyone stop your man on the street to give him a compliment on his suit, or tie?) That is why men rely on their mates to give them such support. So, if you are talking on the phone, and you love the way your partner laughs - tell him/her, if you got an email that really touches you - thank him/her, if you received a photograph and you liked what you saw - share your thoughts!
As you see, these are not terrible secrets, but are very easy-to-follow steps, which can help you make any relationship joyful and fulfilling.