The History Of Weddings

By Author: Paula Maddison
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Some form of marriage has been discovered to exist in all human societies, past and present. Its importance can be seen in the detailed and intricate laws and rituals surrounding it. Although these laws and rituals are as varied and plentiful as human social and cultural organizations, some universals do apply.
The principal legal function of marriage is to ensure the rights of the partners with respect to each other and to establish the rights and define the relationships of children within a community. Marriage has historically conferred a legal status on the offspring, which empowered him or her to the various privileges assured by the culture of that community, including the right of inheritance. In most societies marriage also founded the permissible social interaction allowed to the offspring, including the sufficient selection of future spouses.
Until the late 20th century, marriage was rarely a matter of free choice. In Western societies love between spouses came to be associated with marriage, but even in Western cultures (as the novels of writers such as Henry James and Edith Wharton attest) romantic love ...
... was not the capital motive for matrimony in the majority of eras, and one's marriage partner was carefully chosen.
Endogamy, the process of marrying someone from within one's own tribe or group, is the oldest social regulation of marriage. When the forms of communication with outside groups are restrictive, endogamous marriage is a natural result. Cultural pressures to marry within one's social, economic, and ethnic group are still very strongly regulated in some societies.
Exogamy, the processof marrying outside the group, is prevalent in societies in which kinship partnerships are the most complex, thus excluding from marriage large groups who may trace their lineage to a common ancestry.
In societies in which the large, or extended, family remains the basic unit, marriages are usually arranged by the family. The assumption is that love between the partners occurs after marriage, and much thought is given to the socioeconomic advantages given to the larger family from the match. By contrast, in societies in which the small, or nuclear, family predominates, young adults usually choose their own partners. It is assumed that love precedes (and determines) marriage, and less thought is normally given to the socioeconomic aspects of the match.
In societies with arranged marriages, the almost universal custom is that a person acts as an intermediary, or matchmaker. This person's capitalresponsibility is to arrange a marriage that will be agreeable to the two families represented. Some form of dowry or bridewealth is almost always exchanged in societies that favour arranged marriages.
In societies in which individuals choose their own mates, dating is the most typical way for people to meet and become acquainted with prospective partners. Successful dating may result in courtship, which then usually leads to marriage.
Marriage ritualsThe rituals and ceremonies for marriage in the majority of cultures are associated primarily with abunduncy and confirm the significance of marriage for the continuation of a clan, people, or society. They also assert a familial or communal sanction of the mutual decision and an understanding of the difficulties and sacrifices involved in making what is considered, in most cases, to be a lifelong commitment to and responsibility for the welfare of spouse and children.
Marriage ceremonies include symbolic rites, often sanctified by a religious order, which are considered to confer good fortune on the couple. Because economic considerations play a crucial role in the fruition of child rearing, the presentation of gifts, both real and symbolic, to the married couple are a important part of the marriage ritual. When the exchange of gifts is extensive, either from the bride's family to the bridegroom's or vice versa, this usually indicates that the freedom to choose one's marital partner has been limited and announced by the families of the betrothed.
Fertility rites with the intention to ensure a fruitful marriage exist in some form in all ceremonies. Some of the oldest rituals still to exist in contemporary ceremonies include the conspicuous display of fruits or of cereal grains that are sprinkled over the couple or on their nuptial bed, the accompaniment of a small child with the bride, and the breaking of an object or food to cultivate a successful consummation of the marriage and an easy childbirth.
The most universal ritual is one that symbolizes a sacred union. This may be proclaimed by the joining of hands, an exchange of rings or chains, or the tying of garments. However, all the elements in marriage rituals vary greatly among different societies, and components such as time, place, and the social importance of the event are fixed by tradition and habit.
These rituals are, to a certain extent, formulated by the religious beliefs and practices found in societies throughout the world. In the Hindu tradition, for example, weddings are highly elaborate affairs, involving many prescribed rituals. Marriages are generally arranged by the parents of the couple, and the date of the ceremony is determined by careful astrological calculations. Among the majority of Buddhists marriage remains essentially a secular affair, even though the Buddha offered guidelines for the responsibilities of lay householders.
In Judaism marriage is believed to have been established by God and is described as making the individual complete. Marriage involves a double ceremony, which includes the formal betrothal and wedding rites (prior to the 12th century the two were separated by as much as one year). The modern ceremony opens with the groom signing the marriage contract in front of a group of witnesses. He is then led to the bride's room, where he places a veil on her. This is followed by the ceremony under the huppa (a canopy that signifies the bridal bower), which includes the reading of the marriage contract, the seven marriage benedictions, the groom's placing a ring on the bride's finger (in Conservative and Reform traditions the double ring ceremony has been introduced), and, in most communities, the crushing of a glass under foot. After the ceremony the couple is led into a private room for seclusion, which symbolizes the consummation of the marriage.
From its origins, Christianity has emphasized the spiritual nature and indissolubility of marriage. Jesus Christ spoke of marriage as instituted by God, and most Christians consider it a unshakeable union based upon mutual consent. Some Christian churches confirm marriage as one of the sacraments, and other Christians confirm the sanctity of marriage but don't consider it as a sacrament. Since the Middle Ages, Christian weddings have taken place before a priest or minister, and the ceremony involves the exchange of vows, readings from Scripture, a blessing, and, sometimes, the eucharistic rite.
In Islam marriage is not strictly a sacrament but is always understood as a gift from God or a kind of service to God. The basic Islamic tenets concerning marriage are laid out in the Qur'an, which states that the marital bond rests on "mutual love and mercy," and that spouses are "each other's garments." Muslim men may have up to four wives at one time (though they seldom do), but the wives must all be treated equitably. Marriages are traditionally contracted by the father or guardian of the bride and her intended husband, who must offer his bride the mahr, a payment offered as a gift to guarantee her financial independence.
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