Finances: Perception And Reality

By Author: Oksana Boichenko
Total Articles: 11
Comment this article

While many web sites and stories talk about Russian women, who are looking for ways to scam foreign men for money, there also are many women who are not money hungry. However, there is different culture in attitude and perception of financial matters, which is rarely discussed and explained to men from overseas, causing misunderstandings and miscommunications.
Handling money is a paradox of Russian culture, in a way. People in the US and Europe earn much more, yet are more frugal; Russian people, on the other hand, will often buy things they cannot afford, while earning little, and generally have no savings. As a matter of pride, Russian people will rarely admit that they cannot afford something. In fact, they can sometimes go out of their way to make sure they do not show being limited in funds, so it is uncommon to talk about not being able to afford something (it can even be considered poor manners).
It is also difficult for Russian people to comprehend the value system of money for foreigners (and vice versa); while they might not consider everyone from abroad a millionaire, ...
... they will consider it a sign of greed if a foreigner complains about something being expensive. They find it strange math to say that $800 for a plane ticket is expensive for someone who makes several thousand dollars a month. Average Russian people do not deal with such concepts as bonds, savings, insurance, medical payments, etc. The money they can spend is wages they receive on hand. Until recently they did not have an opportunity to buy things in credit, so cash is still the king, credit cards are not common at all. In Russian people's mentality, having things means one had enough cash to buy it (whether it is an appliance or a house). It is a foreign concept for Russian people to be driving a car that has not been purchased by owner in full and is still owned by the bank, while you are making monthly payments on it.
The only payments Russian people make is for utilities; transportation, food, and everything else is paid by cash as one gets to the matter. So, if a Russian person knows you make several thousand dollars a month and talk about not having money, they will most likely consider your taste extremely expensive, as food, utilities, and public transportation cannot cost that much. Typical salary for Russian people is between $50-200 and they manage to stretch it so they have enough for all their needs, so they really will not be able to understand why you are unable to find $800 for a ticket making thousands of dollars per months, in their minds this can only mean that you are greedy.
Many women will find it very rude to hear foreigners talk about how expensive things are in Russia/Ukraine during travel. They find it appalling to hear someone making thousands of dollars to complain about a hamburger costing a dollar more. For many Russians saying "expensive" generally means not being able to afford something, instead of simply being overpriced. It is also considered very rude to draw attention to how much money is spent when you are on a date with the Russian woman. You might look for other items on the menu, suggest other alternative, but you certainly should not talk about how expensive things are. Also, it is best not to talk about finding good deals on airfare, tickets, etc - while there is nothing wrong with it, your Russian bride will simply not understand your excitement and will, most likely, think that you are trying to save money on her and, therefore, she does not mean that much to you.
Naturally, this does not mean that you should spend hundreds of dollars on a single date, or buy everything your Russian bride asks for. In fact, an honest, decent Russian lady will not be asking you to take her shopping or buy things for her; although you should get her a few presents (at least flowers), at least if you are genuinely interested in her.
Our advice is to avoid conversation about financial matters, at least until you have understood Russian mentality and had a chance to explain to your Russian bride how money works in your country. Complaining about lack of money to people who live on $50-200 month if your paycheck is more than that is certainly not the best idea. Also, unless you are certain that your lady shares your money saving habits and principles, do not talk about how much money you have saved on things related to visiting her, buying something for her, etc. as you risk offending her and causing doubt in sincerity of your intentions.