123ArticleOnline Logo
Welcome to 123ArticleOnline.com!
ALL >> Humor >> View Article

Patch - A Scottish Collie

Profile Picture
By Author: James Collins
Total Articles: 5
Comment this article
Facebook ShareTwitter ShareGoogle+ ShareTwitter Share

Scottish Pet Portraits Patch



A Scottish Collie

It seems as if I've always had dogs around; in my work as a pet portrait artist, under my feet or occupying my favourite chair at home. And also in memories stretching way back into the mists of time, by which, for the curious and the literal, I mean the sixties.
The first dog I can remember as a toddler was called Bonzo (yes, well, I told you it was a long time ago and I think it was probably quite a fashionable name at the time). He was a mutt, no doubt about it; brown, white and orange, and I used to sleep on the stairs with him. Then came Jock, named after my father, who didn't live with us at the time. He had a rough coat, and I suppose was part terrier (no, not my dad, please concentrate).
Later, when I had my own dogs, there was Snooky, who was a collie with a terrier head, then Gub-Gub with the beautiful tail, named after Dr. Doolittle's pig because I liked the name. She was actually a Welsh Collie, fast and slim, and nothing like a pig.
Then there was a Labrador cross, also called Snooky. My wife was for calling her ...
... Lib-Lab but I vetoed that. Keep politics out of the kennel, I say. And finally there came Snooky's favourite daughter Bugle (loudest in the litter) and little scruffy Pebbles, who was really my wife's dog. The last two are still with us. So you can see that I know about dogs, or so I thought before we acquired Patch.


Patch is a Border Collie. He is not aggressive; in fact he is very lovable and quite gentle with our other two dogs, as long as they know who's the boss and as long as they do as they're telt, and fast, like. Ken? (Well, he is a Scot!). I have to admit that Patch is a puzzle. If he doesn't want to do a thing, he won't. It's as simple as that. He can't be tricked, flattered or scolded into doing something, because he's not that easily impressed.
But there are ways to manage him. If you want him to follow you; walk away. You know, like the Horse Whisperer. It's not because he doesn't relate; he really loves us and he is obedient in his own way. He will sit, go down, give either paw and 'talk'. He just doesn't see the point of doing something he doesn't want to, all right?


He has plenty of the legendary energy and intelligence of the finest sheepdog in the world. I usually take a tennis racquet and ball on our walks in the woods to try, in my optimistic way, to tire him out. We live in a hilly, and fairly wild part of the Highlands, and I only have to say to him, "Patch, that way", or even just point, and he'll be there, waiting for the ball, whether it's up the brae or across a burn.
And yet, for all his intelligence and boldness, he is sensitive and easily frightened. At the first hint of a raised or angry voice (it wouldn't be mine, you understand), he goes to pieces and hides...
Yes, our boy is difficult at times, but always fascinating, and I don't have to tell you that we love him to bits.


He was a gash and faithful tyke
As ever lap a sheugh or dyke;
His honest, sonsie, baws'nt face
Aye gat him friends in ilka place.

His breast was white, his towsie back
Weel clad wi' coat o' glossy black,
His gaucie tail wi' upward curl
Hung o'er his hurdies wi' a swirl.
The Twa Dogs
Robert Burns

Gash = wise sheugh = ditch sonsie = cute bawsn't = striped like a badger towsie = shaggy gaucie = large hurdies = hips

Six months ago my Patch died, and I have to learn to get along without him. I now have a Border Collie pup crossed with Something Else. He has none of the nervousness of Patch. He is a friend to all the world. And yet...and yet...If he doesn't want to do something...
We do not forget, but we move on.

James Collins
www.pet-portraits-scotland.com

About the Author James Collins is an artist, musician and writer working in the Scottish highlands. These days he specialises in portraits of pets and other animals, but he still finds time to paint and draw the beautiful scenery of Scotland.
He lives near the coast, overlooking the moray Firth, with his wife, daughter and three dogs.

Total Views: 358Word Count: 766See All articles From Author

Add Comment

Humor Articles

1. Natural Solutions For Young Peoples: Addressing Common Issues With Herbal Remedies
Author: Sri Hari

2. Wordpress Support For High-performing Websites
Author: WordPress support

3. Mold In Your Home: Risks For Newborns And Senior Citizens
Author: BayAreaMoldPros

4. Enhance Your Kitchen Efficiency With Tbc Supplies: A Guide To Kitchen Shelving And Inline Exhaust Fans
Author: Sarah Williams

5. The Ultimate Guide To Sectional Overhead Doors: Understanding, Types, And Benefits
Author: UK Doors and Shutters

6. Laughing Matters: The Role Of Humor In Mental Health
Author: Im Perfect by Urveez

7. Motivational Shayari In Hindi - प्रेरणादायक शायरी हिंदी में
Author: Kuldeep Rana

8. Oldest Pawn Shop In San Fernando Valley Continues To Evolve To Meet Customer Needs
Author: 1888pressrelease

9. Truu Salon Named To The Salon Today 200 By Salon Today Magazine For The Sixth Time
Author: 1888pressrelease

10. 10 Reasons Why Appreciation Is Important
Author: Geethanjali varanasi

11. Which Is The Best Type Of T-shirts For Girls?
Author: Rohit

Login To Account
Login Email:
Password:
Forgot Password?
New User?
Sign Up Newsletter
Email Address: